January 5, 2000
The Future's So Bright, I Gotta Dig My Eyes Out With A Spork

With the arrival of this new year with lots of zeros in it, people everywhere are begging the question, "What can we expect to see from the Meathead Perspective in the coming year?" (after the questions "Will there still be eggs in the future?" and "Why does the new president of Russia look like John Denver?") Well, I intend to make the Meathead Perspective more enjoyable for everybody this year (except for the people who hate this page, screw them anyway). Here's how!

Hey, It's (Not) The New Millennium!

Because it's the year 2000, the Meathead Perspective shall be henceforth known as "The Meathead Perspective 2000," in order to be "hip" and "with it." This will help those of us who have a tendency to forget what year it is and need to be constantly reminded every goddamn day.

Changing of the Guard

Effective immediately, I am resigning as President of the Meathead Perspective. From now on, it will be updated by my droid that I made out of soup cans and Game Boy parts. Fear him!

Give Peace a Chance or I'll Kick Your Ass

As we enter this new era, we should try to improve the way we treat others, so that we can help reduce unnecessary conflicts and stress. That is why I pledge to not disrespect or make fun of others just because they're stupid and their music blows. People as a whole need to learn to exercise tolerance in this day and age, even to those with talent equal to that of a bucket of gorilla dung. They're people, too.

Sign #842 of the Apocalypse

Using state-of-the-art, groundbreaking technology, the Meathead Perspective will feature new, exciting scratch-n-sniff pictures of Trent Reznor and Leo Herrera.

Warning: Only sniff Leo pictures in well-ventilated areas.

Admit It, You Like Grotesque Half-Breeds

2000 looks to be a year where science will make great leaps and bounds in the field of fucking with people's DNA. In celebration of this, the Meathead Perspective will show even more disturbing pictures of people mixed with other people, such as Trent Reznor mixed with Butt-head as shown on the left. More to come!

We's Be In Dis Here Together Now

Since ebonics is the language of the new millennium, the Meathead Perspective will begin to incorporate ebonics more and more, by using words and phrases such as "dope", "phat", "supa dupa fly" and the ever-popular "gettin' jiggy with it". I hope to also include live pictures of Trent getting jiggy on stage as they become available.

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